Yesterday, 03:16 AM
There is no creature on God's green earth more drunk on imaginary authority than an internet moderator with a superiority complex.
Give some socially maladjusted basement goblin the ability to delete comments and suddenly the motherfucker thinks he's the Supreme Court, the FBI, and Batman rolled into one.
Congratulations, dipshit. You've been entrusted with the sacred responsibility of removing spam from a website that gets 37 visitors a day. Truly, the weight of civilization rests upon your shoulders.
These assholes will write a 900-word explanation about why your comment violated Section 4, Subsection B of the community guidelines because you called somebody a "dumbass."
Meanwhile, their entire personality consists of anime avatars, unresolved childhood trauma, and a pathological need to be respected by strangers.
And don't even get me started on the ones who announce they're "stepping down from the moderation team."
Motherfucker, you're not resigning from the Pentagon. You're quitting an unpaid position deleting dick jokes from a discussion board. Nobody's lowering the flags to half-staff.
Then you've got the power-tripping bastards who lock threads with some pompous little announcement:
*"This discussion has run its course."*
OH HAS IT, YOUR MAJESTY?
Thank Christ you were here to save us from the terrifying possibility of two grown adults calling each other retards on the internet.
And the absolute worst are the moderators who insist that moderating is a "thankless job."
NO SHIT. YOU VOLUNTEERED.
Nobody dragged your ass out of bed at gunpoint and forced you to become the Assistant Regional Vice President of Removing Offensive Memes.
Here's a radical concept: moderate actual spam, illegal shit, and genuine harassment. Otherwise, let people argue, swear, offend each other, and occasionally make complete fucking idiots of themselves.
The internet was supposed to be a lawless digital frontier full of weirdos, lunatics, intellectuals, and spectacularly offensive assholes.
Not a fucking kindergarten supervised by emotionally fragile hall monitors who think a ban button makes their balls bigger.
**So what's the worst experience you've ever had with a power-drunk internet moderator?**
Bonus points if the bastard wrote you a farewell essay before banning you.
Give some socially maladjusted basement goblin the ability to delete comments and suddenly the motherfucker thinks he's the Supreme Court, the FBI, and Batman rolled into one.
Congratulations, dipshit. You've been entrusted with the sacred responsibility of removing spam from a website that gets 37 visitors a day. Truly, the weight of civilization rests upon your shoulders.
These assholes will write a 900-word explanation about why your comment violated Section 4, Subsection B of the community guidelines because you called somebody a "dumbass."
Meanwhile, their entire personality consists of anime avatars, unresolved childhood trauma, and a pathological need to be respected by strangers.
And don't even get me started on the ones who announce they're "stepping down from the moderation team."
Motherfucker, you're not resigning from the Pentagon. You're quitting an unpaid position deleting dick jokes from a discussion board. Nobody's lowering the flags to half-staff.
Then you've got the power-tripping bastards who lock threads with some pompous little announcement:
*"This discussion has run its course."*
OH HAS IT, YOUR MAJESTY?
Thank Christ you were here to save us from the terrifying possibility of two grown adults calling each other retards on the internet.
And the absolute worst are the moderators who insist that moderating is a "thankless job."
NO SHIT. YOU VOLUNTEERED.
Nobody dragged your ass out of bed at gunpoint and forced you to become the Assistant Regional Vice President of Removing Offensive Memes.
Here's a radical concept: moderate actual spam, illegal shit, and genuine harassment. Otherwise, let people argue, swear, offend each other, and occasionally make complete fucking idiots of themselves.
The internet was supposed to be a lawless digital frontier full of weirdos, lunatics, intellectuals, and spectacularly offensive assholes.
Not a fucking kindergarten supervised by emotionally fragile hall monitors who think a ban button makes their balls bigger.
**So what's the worst experience you've ever had with a power-drunk internet moderator?**
Bonus points if the bastard wrote you a farewell essay before banning you.